please hassle me i thrive on stress!

ok so that is on a t-shirt that i have (which used to be my brothers) and today was literally the epitomy of that. today was full of junk that just made me feel like the dutch boy trying to hold back the entire dam with his fingers! bleah! and im sure you can all guess how well it worked too. man i was hoping to make it at least to february until i had my first crying/stressball breakdown in regards to my senior recital...yeah not so much. apparently that was a bit too optimistic. oh well...maybe that will be the only one...hahahaha! ok just kidding. its amazing how some days just make you feel like a punching bag and i just find it so funny how you can take so much of it and then you just dont have any more room to absorb stuff. but i am thankful to be surrounded by people who were supportive today and gave me a shoulder to cry on (actually quite literally) and who calmed me down and reminded me of what is important and that i need to remember what my dad always says...you've got to just take one day at a time...how true and how difficult. mmm the joys of being an emotionally sensitive person...mmm ah well tomorrow will be better and today has improved so its all good...and yeah go ahead hassle me...then see what happens!


(side note: i do not take any responsibility for my actions if hassled)

Disney eat your heart out!

I live in the best place ever! The amount of nature that surrounds me even in this populated area...its great! Today as I went to school (even though I found out once I got there that it had been cancelled...yeah that was a fun surprise let me tell you!) I saw the usual twenty thousand squirrel's on campus and heading back home I saw two bluejays. But the kicker was my back yard. Three bunny rabbits and a pair of cardinals...all in a 5 ft. by 5ft. spot...yeah it looked like a hallmark greeting card and the scary part to me is that I could be content to just sit there all day and watch em. I cant sit still for anything unless Im watching nature...go figure! These are the days when I wish my telephoto lense was just a bit longer...cause then I would have been able to get some photos...but its not so I didnt. :( Well Im off to go see if I can spot anything else today...cheers!

a reflection and then-some

so tonight was girl's coffee night where the gathering's girls meets and 'discusses amongst themselves'. we were to go around tonight and talk about what god's been teaching us when i really started to think about all that god has taught me in the last year. and its amazing! god has slowly been showing me my worth, my true worth. and while its been hard and ive been fighting all the way...its been freeing too. in the last year i quit two jobs that just killed my spirit, ive gone back to what i love, god's reinforced that i have a passion for children, and music, and dancing, and just worshiping god. ive started many stellar friendships and (get this!) KEPT them! that is something im not always the best at because i end up running when things get hard, hard that is for me. ive learned more about myself and what i need to survive: plenty of quiet time, time alone away from people, sleep, eating healthy foods and regularly, god, an abundance of love which god has provided, and strong support from those who are also on a strong walk with god. that is just the starter list too. this year has been a whirlwind and my uncle's death has only impressed that on me more. life is way to short to sit on the side lines or wait for it to pass on by or to be sitting somewhere where you arent happy. i dont want to not like where im at...i want to be happy in the now, i want to be happy with what ive got and who im with. i want to find the little things to rejoice about. i dont want to waste what short time i've got, cause i do know that...that whenever my time does come i will think its been too short and i want to get as much crammed in as possible. so here's to many more nights of laughter as well as finding out that potato flakes have their own aisle at the hen house.
:)